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I wanted to take a moment today to thank each of you who bless me with your presence here on simplychronicallyill.
Every one of you have enriched my life with your kindness, comments, knowledge and encouragement and I am thankful for every visit.
Wishing all you a day of peace, love, laughter, smiles and kindness.
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fear
seeps into your mind like an early morning fog,
slowly expanding into all the open trenches
unfilled spaces
finding places in the mind you didn’t know existed
enlarging to leave no room for productive thoughts
protecting its position like a vicious dog guarding it’s home
settling in like the dust in the carpet
seemingly unnoticed and determined to anchor down for the long haul
I am ready to clean house
sweeping it out, not under the rug
searching for all the hiding places
wanting to turn this into a childhood game i no longer want to play
i will find you
searching, one-by-one, the hidden rooms of my mind,
evicting the fear and pain
refilling the room with light and love and hope
slamming the door shut with a vengence
securing the deadbolt and allowing the love to expand to fill each and every room.
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YOU my dear are worthy of love
YOU were chosen to be here
hand picked to be on this Earth
there is only one YOU
only one
never before and never will there be another person as special as YOU
today, i celebrate your uniqueness, the qualities that make you special
YOU deserve respect
YOU are not alone
YOU are loved
thank YOU for being YOU
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that you experience true love
soaking in the sweetness of being loved for who you are
no matter what your failings, limitations or inabilities that may fill your body
that you feel safe in the arms of another
held when you are unsure or scared
lying closely as your heartbeats create a synchronous rhythm of comfort and respect
that your hand will be held with gentleness and caring to help guide you through life
you are comforted when ill
and protected when you are weak
that you find joy in their presence
your 1,000th kiss will feel like the first
and your day will not be complete without seeing the beauty of your love reflected back in their face
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I was out with my entire family, something that rarely happens due to lack of funds and/ or my kids’ busy work, school and activity schedules.
During this rare treasured outing, my husband and I had purchased all of the kids a snack and they were sitting together on a bench eating, smiling, getting along and thanking us for the food.
In that moment, I became completely overwhelmed by what was playing out before me – happy, smiling, joking, loving, grateful, thankful kids. Tears welled up in my eyes and I had a very hard time keeping myself from breaking down into uncontrolable sobs. My son looked up at me and said, “mom, please don’t cry” which made holding back the tears an even bigger challenge.
In the past, many of my tears were more about the guilt I have held onto for so long, raising kids while my illness took a front seat. Having children before I knew I had these congenital illnesses, and the true horror of discovering that you have passed these nightmares onto the ones you love more than life itself.
But this is not what I was feeling in that moment. Instead, I was caught up in pure love for my children, the extreme gratitude that God had blessed me with each one of them and felt me worthy of giving me such beautiful humans to care for. God believed that I was worthy of being their mother, a gift I humbly treasure every – single – day.
Not only has God seen me worthy of such enormous blessings as my children, but that He has also covered over my failings, filled in the numerous cracks that I left as a ill and flawed human being. He did what I had prayed and prayed that He would do, to make up for my many shortcomings as a parent, and despite my illnesses, allow my kids to grow up to be loving, caring, compassionate and unique individuals. Prayers answered………and because of these gifts, my heart was too full with awe. The happiness that flowed through my veins could not be contained within my body but instead flowed over and out my eyes………
They say that the window to one’s soul is through the eyes……….I hope my children could see that the tears were from the love overflowing in my heart for each one of them.
~ wendi is the author of two books that you can view here.
Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
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when i see you cry
a small part of me dies
i want to shelter you from every storm
create a world that is safe
for you to be free from pain
i want you to move through life as you please
independently with abundance of laughter and joy
but life is not always fair
bad things happen to extraordinary people
and despite my deepest desire and my fervent prayers
i can’t make it better
so when i see you cry
part of me dies…….
~ wendi is the author of two books, you can view them here.
Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
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release all my thoughts
may my hand express the heart
let my words send love
Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
~ I am the author, under the pen name Charlie Lee Austin, of Frugal Seeds 501 Ways to Make, Save or Stretch a Dollar.
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love
when you have nothing to prove,
nothing left to give,
nothing left to receive,
……and you still remain peacefully and joyfully steadfast.
Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
~ wendi, under the pen name Charlie, is the author of Frugal Seeds: 501 Ways to Make, Save, or Stretch a Dollar
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true love is not easy, in fact it is down right hard.
loving someone when everything is going well is easy, so easy it makes me laugh.
real love is when you stick around for the hard stuff.
the real hard stuff isn’t financial troubles or family squabbles…..
if you are physically well, you can work two jobs, it might be hard but, if you are healthy it is doable.
family issues can be worked out if you have the health to endure them or capable to physically pick yourself up and move.
but illness………it shakes you to the core. lives are transformed in an instant, roles change, individuals get lost in the symptoms leaving the caretaker to fed for themselves in a sea of uncertainty.
only with true love do you have the freedom to heal.
Today, may you experience a sense of healing, no matter how small.
Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
~ wendi, under the pen name Charlie, is the author of Frugal Seeds: 501 Ways to Make, Save, or Stretch a Dollar.
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People
Encouraging (and)
Achieving
Calm (with)
Everyone
Unauthorised use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
~ wendi, under the pen name Charlie, is the author of Frugal Seeds: 501 Ways to Make, Save or Stretch a Dollar
