Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
I am searching a dense forest,
no sunlight can reach me,
its vastness surrounds me and I cannot find my way,
I whisper his name…..
and all I can hear is my own voice calling back to me…..saying
……..where are you?
Photo by David Whittaker on Pexels.com
moving through life at a slower pace does not make you less important……
instead…..
it is giving you the chance to see the small, beautiful details in life that so many people miss
Photo by Mikes Photos on Pexels.com
loss makes you realize just how much more you have left to lose……..
Photo by DANIEL AKASHI on Pexels.com
solitude, isolation, seclusion mean the state of one who is alone. solitude may imply a condition of being apart from all human beings or of being cut off by wish or circumstances from one’s usual associates.
isolation stresses detachment from others often involuntarily.
seclusion suggests a shutting away or keeping apart from others often connoting deliberate withdrawal from the world or retirement to a quiet life.
ISOLATION this is such a sad and lonely word, just pushing the sounds across your tongue sounds just……….blah.
ISOLATION is what the prison system uses to further punish those who misbehave while behind bars. It is meant to break people so they never want to do another bad thing.
Many individuals with chronic illness are living isolated lives. Isolation leads to even more unwanted side effects or exaggeration of current symptoms such as depression, anxiety, worry, loneliness and pain.
No one wants to feel lonely and too many people are scared to admit they feel alone because, simply put, in today’s world, it equals loser, or worse yet, unlovable. Obviously this is not true, but those feelings are there none-the-less.
Being chronically ill, we have already lost so much……..previous abilities to do what we loved, stamina, a good night sleep, to interact with our surrounding in a immediate and prompt way……adding loneliness into the mix is a huge slap in the face, fuel to the fire.
This world (at least here in the US) is fixated on the health, youth, independence, wealth, and “beauty” at all costs and people do not take time to slow down and go and visit a friend who is ill, let alone even know who their neighbors are…………so what can we do about this?
…….PLEASE, if you know someone in your neck of the woods who is alone, sick, lonely, can’t get out and interact with the world on a regular basis, please take 1 hour out of the next 30 days and do something about it. This simple act of kindness, multiplied by many, sends love where it needs to be, with those who can use it the most. If you are personally unable to get out of your home, send a card or a letter to someone else who is in a similar situation. Emails are nice and texts can be great too, but taking the time to send a personal note shows you took an extra step out of your day and thought of them in a very real way. Now please go……………
Photo by Darcy Lawrey on Pexels.com
the drums are beating…………i hear them from afar and they draw me in.
as i walk i try to hide myself from its pull
the beats, like my heart, give life to all that is around it
i creep closer……….the drum is under the open sky
i search for people………no one is there,
the drum is beating on its own
calling out to those who need to hear it, it draws us in……….
people begin encircling the drum from all directions- walking out of the darkness
searching for their own beating heart
Photo by Johannes Plenio on Pexels.com
no one can truly understand the pain and discomfort of living
to understand the masks put on every day, to live within the confines of this society, not to be viewed as worthless, useless, in a culture that wants fast paced living, quick movements, immediate answers, a fountain of youth, boundless energy, radiating health………..
we struggle to even maneuver down this path……….it is twisting, turning sharply with multiple bumps in the road
it’s a lonely road we roam…………..the desperation, the clinging onto hope, the desire to feel normal……………it is astounding thoughts of healing we try to keep alive – pushed to the back of our minds so not to be overwhelmed with the thoughts of what might be.
the road is endless and uncharted. it is an intimidating place to ramble as the fog covers the path – your view is obscured…………you have no ability to see where you are going.
it’s like taking a trip, to an unknown place without any clue to where you are going or how you are going to get there…………..not a path I would have chosen to take, but one I am on nonetheless.
Photo by Umberto Shaw on Pexels.com
i can’t keep up with you……………
…………do you secretly want to leave me?
i anxiously worry about the future……………………what if i don’t heal
…………will you dream about leaving me?
what if i get worse………….and i can no longer leave the house?
………..will you pray about leaving me?
what if i require even more of your time and energy………………..
……….will you desire to leave me?
what if i can no longer walk by your side…………………
……………will you hope to live a life free of me?
what if you become bored and she can do more………….
………….will you plan to leave me?
i am so thankful you have stayed this long…………..is it selfish to ask for more?
who wants to be tied down when you are physically able and free to go………………….
……………do you want to leave me?
………….what if?
