living our best life – you

/ simplywendi
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Today’s question is short and sweet, “What is one thing that you have learned about yourself since you have become chronically ill?”

 

~ Thank you very much for stopping by, reading, and leaving a comment.  Please know that sharing a small part of your world means a lot to me and others who read your reflections.    

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113 thoughts on “living our best life – you”

  1. Ooo good question! I think the answer should be positive and yet the things that come to my mind first are negatives, like learning how much guilt I seem to carry. For a positive, I’ve learned that I am far more independent than I ever realised, not needing others since my social life and friends up and vanished. I can be okay by myself and it’s been that way for years now (baring the online world, of course!). What about you?xx

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    • Thank you SO much Caz for being willing to speak a negative. I know that all of us try so hard to stay up beat and on the cheery side but sometimes I just want to scream “This Whole Thing Sucks!” I can completely relate to the guilt……..and that is a very complicated feeling to work through and I am so very you experience it too……..like you asked to be ill, right?! I love how you have discovered that you are independent and a complete bad a$$ – you inspire me girl! 🙂
      me……I would say that I had no idea I could continue to function on some level feeling this poorly………..some days I completely amaze myself – thanks for asking.

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  2. I’m a fighter and a lot tougher than I even knew. That’s one thing being diagnosed with Celiac and Cachexia has taught me. The main thing I’ve learned is that God is so much more faithful than I could have ever imagined. God bless!

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  3. Thanks for sharing!.. well, I don’t believe that I would consider myself someone who is “chronically ill” though I do deal with occasional issues that comes with the ageing process… that being said, as long as I follow my heart with a open mind, I learn a lot about myself every day… “ I am currently attending the School of Life, learning more about the universe and me… and Graduation Day will be the day of my funeral and it is then I will know if I failed or I succeeded and graduated”… (Larry “Dutch” Woller)… 🙂

    Until we meet again..
    May your spirit only know peace
    May your heart only know love
    May all your dreams come true
    May your life’s journey be filled with happiness
    And life is all that you wish for it to be….
    (Larry “Dutch” Woller)

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    • Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing Dutch! I so appreciate the way to view the world and life and I am sure you will graduate. 🙂 The world is a much better place with you in it. .

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    • I am so very sorry to read that you wife has recently started dialysis……..I am happy to know that you are willing to work hard to life life to the fullest and do what it takes to stay as healthy as possible. I have sent up prayers for both of you this afternoon………..

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    • My heart reached out when I read about Mona beginning dialysis. I have been a renal patient for 40+ years. I had to resume dialysis in 2018 and amazingly was able to get my third transplant in April 2019. I completely what your wife is dealing with and I have done both peritoneal and hemo. You are in my thoughts today and I send you best wishes to still be able to enjoy life together. – David

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  6. Though I wouldn’t put myself in chronically ill category, but suffering from deteriorating knees for years, I have learned that it’s only me who can help myself feel better. Only I cake take steps to improve my health. And no one else.

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  7. I have learned to accept my disability, I no longer fight it but modify my activities to function around and with it. Acceptance eliminates the feeling of having to battle against it relieving stress. I have also learned to work successfully with my Doctors. Great question, thanks for asking.

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    • Thank you so very much Jacques for stopping by to comment……..I love that you have accepted your disability……..I know this is a very important step on living your best life…….and if it takes away stress, that is a HUGE win! 🙂

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  8. I was always told I had a lot of patience, since I was a little girl. Since my illness, I’ve learned that yes, I have patience, but it’s often just on the outside. I keep things inside, and sometimes it isn’t pretty.
    Mostly I’ve learned to lean on my Lord Jesus, to rest in His arms. All things that go on with me have come through His filter, and He has His reasons. He has taught me acceptance, and that I still have much to learn. I still rebel (and I still pay for it), I still learn that confession and repentance bring peace, and He still (and always) accepts me and loves me.

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    • I love this Kathy…….having a lot of patience is a virtue that I have worked very hard to obtain and continue to fail………I love that you are so patient with others, this is a true gift and blessing for those around you. But, as you pointed out, keeping things bottled up is not good. I love that you rest in the arms of Jesus…….what a beautiful and safe place to be! thank you so much for sharing……….

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  9. Only one thing?!?!?!? I have learned that everyone has ‘something’. I have learned to think before I speak. Most importantly I have learned that helping to “lift” other people FEELS much better than being negative

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    • GOOD for you!!! learning to let the guilt go is such a HUGE step to dealing with chronic illness. I am so happy 🙂 for you! Thank you so very much for stopping by and commenting, I really appreciate your time.

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  14. That I can do me Wendi. One of the hardest things to do is say ‘no’ to the many. Our fears hold us in that pattern of ‘I must’ to be accepted, when all we are doing is denying ourselves. Don’t get me wrong, there are responsibilities we take on in our belief in who we are, but it is that other ‘holding pattern to be accepted’ that holds us back. I found the pattern of my fear and undid it. Tough little bugger too, I think the stitching was made of wire 😂 🤣 ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

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    • 🙂 I have found my stictching to be made of steel. 🙂 Thank you so very much Mark for stopping by and commenting…….I had made a comment on someone else’s blog today that learning to be who I truly am has been a very difficult and decades long process……….to learn to be you is the best gift you can give you yourself – God bless you for sharing. 🙂

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      • You too dear lady. Our journey does take many, many years so we will appreciate what we have endured to find that love and happiness we have always looked for. It is there most certainly, just waiting until we reach that point so that we can understand it when it does make itself known. May your ‘known’ be held in the love that you deserve kind lady 😀 ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

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      • You are absolutely right……..it really is about the love and happiness we have always looked for. Thank you! You just provided me with a lot to think about. God bless you Mark.

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  16. That IS a great question! I think adjusting my expectation and learning to be happy with different circumstances. Now if only other ppl would “get” that it isn’t giving up to do things that ARE within my ability and to find things I CAN do!.

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    • Thank you so much for stopping by! I LOVE that you have learned to be happy despite your circumstances and doing what is within your limits. I know the frustration with others thinking you are not doing enough……..unless you live it, you just can’t get it!

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      • Thanks Wendi! It was a surprise for me; here I assumed everyone would “applaud” that I have found ways to be active and creative and shift my purpose and resolve to things that are positives for me! (Like my blog…my hands don’t work right and I used to draw but I CAN take pics of food, even if I can’t even hold a “big” camera. !)

        I’ve also learned to change my expectations of people. I can’t change anyone or convince anyone of anything. There are those that will always drag you down, those that a mix and those that are uplifting and positive. I’ve learned that you can’t just keep trying to give energy to or pet the tigers and the snakes when you can have such a good relationship full of acceptance, give and take and caring and support that goes both way with so many others!! And if I do have to be around those snakes or tigers sometime, I’ve learned to gear up mentally and guard myself. But if pain and disability has taught me anything it’s that it’s best if I expend my energy where it’s needed, wanted and appreciated!

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      • This contains SO much beautiful words of wisdom! I LOVE your phrase, pet the tigers, as it is SO true…….to fill yourself up before you spend time with people like that but to make sure to focus your precious, limited energy on where and how it is needed and appreciated. Bravo my dear, bravo! I so wished I would have learned this MUCH much ealier in my life. Thank you again for leaving such awesome comments and Bravo for all that you do……….You are an inspiration!

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    • Hi Isabel, thank you so very much for stopping by! I love that you know how strong you are and you are ok with being an awesome strong woman who also allows herself to be vulnerable. 🙂 This is awesome. Thank you so much for sharing.

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  19. I have learned that I’m stronger than I could have ever imagined. There is actually quite a few things I have learned but anybody with a chronic illness has immense strengths. Strengths that are required to go on each day, to face each day anew, even if they are filled with pain and threaten to break you. People with chronic diseases are my true super heroes.

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  20. Although Michael is chronically ill, Wendi, and I worry about him all the time, especially now. He is the most amazing boy, with the kindest nature. I am sure God gave me Michael to make up for all the other stresses and problems I have experience over the years – he is my sunshine boy.

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    • Being a beautiful soul that you are………of course you worry about him all the time. I also have children who are chronically ill and it is heart wrenching life with worry………
      Thank you so very much for sharing this Robbie……..I have sent a prayer up for your sunshine boy!

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  21. Love the question! My short answer: I learned that I could heal myself. Long answer is that I documented EVERYTHING about how I reversed lifetime (40+ years anyway) of asthma in my body, and wrote a holistic health book about all of that (and more)! It’s called, Take It Upon Yourself to Live a Wholly Vibrant Life! ❤️🦋🌀🙏😉

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  22. I’d already learnt from previous life changing experiences that people are the most important, but what did I learn about me via my chronic illness? I suppose I began to really appreciate the small, simple things in life. My ego was less in charge.

    (((HUGS))) dear Wendi xo Love and better health to you and yours.

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  23. Good question, Wendi.
    Although I’m not chronically ill, I do have mental illness as well as back & knee issues for years.
    With the sessions, I have with my therapist and psychiatrist monthly + medication, I have been handling things better than I normally would have if I didn’t have them.
    As far as the chronic pain in both knees and back, I roll with the punches and take things in stride. I know my limitations and never push myself too hard.
    Now that the weather is changing for the better, I’m thinking of taking short walks just to get fresh air and work off the extra pounds I’ve gained over this period of being in lockdown. Crossing fingers on that one! LOL!

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    • I am so happy that you are doing what you need to do to take care of yourself mentally and physically……..knowing our limits can keep us from unnecessary pain. 🙂 Thank you so much for visiting and I hope you enjoy your outside walks.

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  24. Dear Wendi,
    Wow, I loved reading all of these great responses that people have shared here! What a great question. There are so many things, but one of the biggest things I have learned (and am still learning!) is that the “self-sufficient” me that was so strong, was only ever God’s strength. He is just making that much more obvious now. I cannot even begin to try otherwise. Thanks again for your compassionate heart, Wendi. You are such a blessing.

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    • Thank you so very much Bettie for your kind words! Isn’t it wonderful that you not only learned that we need God to rely on but that it is in His strength that keeps us going. This is such a beautiful lessson that many of us struggle with on a daily basis. Thank you so very much for sharing! 🙂

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  26. That is another very interesting question, Wendy. I’m not sure how to answer that. I’m not in the ‘chronic’ category exactly. I just have residual affects from Bells Palsey and Pulmonary Fibrosis which is classed as ‘terminal’. I found I have very little patience for illness in myself. I keep pushing my limits which has been in many ways helpful. I’ve passed my sell by date and still going strong. I do give in and comfort myself with food though which doesn’t help. It happens when I feel I can’t control my physical environment. I have made all my exit preparations and now live each day as though it might be my last. Gratitude is huge, even more so than before. Every day and everything in it is a gift. I’m no longer uptight about so many silly things. I don’t know if this is what you mean but this is where my mind goes. Keep taking care of yourself.

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    • oh wow! I LOVE your response!!!!! You gave so much great advice on how we should live our lives every day………not getting uptight over things that don’t matter, being aware that there are so many things we can’t control, living our lives with gratitude, keep pushing ourselves, live our lives to the fullest possible………you my dear should write a book………..you have so much to teach us. Thank you so much for sharing…….it has been such a pleasure to ge to know you and learn from you! 🙂

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      • Thank you so much, Wendi. I’m just passing on what I’ve learned from so many in my almost 72 years. I saw your comment on Pam’s post this morning and know you are on the right path. I am trying to get enough time between all the rest to write my stories for my children. Who knows what will happen if I actually finish it. 🙂 It has been a most interesting life and I’m grateful for it. Now, back to work. Keep looking for the silver lining.

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  27. A great question Wendi and very interesting insightful answers.

    I’ve learned that…
    I am a slow learner,
    Learning takes many lessons,
    The most painful lessons are the best teachers
    The goal is to become aware and conscious enough to change.

    You are tapping into something wonderful here Wendi, keep going!!

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    • wow!!! again, thank you so very much for your kind words, I am deeply humbled by them. I love what you have learned……..reading your responses I have realized that I am also a very slow learner………..I always have been in all areas of my life. And your goal is my goal and I didn’t even know it…………God bless you for taking the time to stop by and leave these wonderful words of wisdom……….such a gift. 🙂

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  29. As the mother, Wendi, I have learned that I have much to be grateful for. Although both my boys have chronic conditions, there are so many other mothers whose children are ever so much more sick and whose prognosis’ are much worse than my boys. This was an important and uplifting lesson to learn.

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  30. That is an easy one to answer for me Wendi..
    I have l learnt that I am stronger than my body… That there is nothing that when I put my MIND to it I can overcome… But most of all…. and most important… I have learnt to LOVE ME…. My body, the imperfections, the flaws, and I can now look within at my reflection and look me square in the eyes.. And tell myself I LOVE YOU!… And the moment I learnt to do that… My inner healing began, which triggered my body to help heal itself…
    Sending LOVE and Well wishes Wendi… ❤ 🙏💚💛💜

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